(Previous post: A not so quiet evening at home)
Hannah woke up to an empty bed the next morning. That was a bit of an oddity since her husband almost always overslept and had to be basically dragged out of bed, which now made her wonder if he had slept at all. Sighing she got up, tied her hair in a bun and went to the kitchen to make breakfast, she didn’t want Ty and Haley to have to eat the burnt out sandwiches they had for dinner last night.
She tried to focus on the cooking but her mind was elsewhere. She replayed the talk she had with her husband the night before over and over in her head. Perhaps she had been too harsh on him, he did have the best intentions at heart and perhaps he was right… Perhaps she was the one being unreasonable… Her kids were good kids, Ty was on the honor roll last semester, Haley had just started school and was making friends, Kerry had a girlfriend, Freddie was… Being Freddie… But they were all okay…
But Hannah was afraid, afraid of what would happen if she allowed herself to be selfish, to put herself first, even for an instant, for one single long weekend… It could change everything… It could change her… She could wake up and see she had become her mother… A woman who allowed herself to be selfish, who put herself first and ended up leaving her family to go be with her lover… And don’t we all become our parents in the end? Hannah asked herself with a shudder.
Unpleasant as those thoughts had been for Hannah thinking about her mother gave her an idea. Before her mother started seeing Jesse Hoves she ran for City Council, and while politics wasn’t Hannah’s thing she wondered if it was time she got a job, a proper one this time. Maybe having something else in her life would help her find balance, and not become either to obsessed with her kids or too selfish like her mother….
Hannah had graduated from med school recently but she gave up her dream of being a doctor long ago… But maybe it wasn’t too late for her too do something related to medicine, not many places would give job to an elder but Hannah was lucky to have friends in high places at least…
“I can’t help you Hannah… I wish I could… But I am retired now…” Her friend Pegasus Santoro told her when she went to visit him later that day. It was a surprise when she called him and he told her to come to his house instead of the hospital but Hannah thought maybe he had the day off… She couldn’t believe her best friend had retired, medicine was his life, his dream… She stepped back, her smile disappearing from her face.
“But why? I thought you liked your job… You always said it was more then a job… A calling…” She blurted out looking at her friend. When had he got those lines on his face? When did he get so old? She wondered thinking about the shy, lost new kid who awkwardly walked in her class one day… Ages ago… Pegagus smiled sadly.
“I still loved my job… I just… Got tired.” He finished with a sigh. “I gave myself to the Sacred Spleen Hospital, to the town of Sunset Valley… I never had a family, kids… And now… It may be too late for that but I want to rest, to be with Mel…” For a minute Hannah hesitated, here was a man who lived one of her dreams only to have to give up the other… And how silly was she thinking she could have it all… “I wish I could help.” Pegagus repeated sadly. “But you can always talk to Andrew…” Now it was Hannah’s turn to sigh. She knew talking to her brother was an option. Andrew was the chief of staff at Sacred Spleen but she hoped she would get a job as a result of a recommendation for one of the leading specialist in infectious disease, not as a result of her brother’s intervention…
But now that she knew that she had no choice Hannah walked straight to the hospital. While she waited in the sterile while lobby for the elevator to take her to the top floor and her brother’s office she realized she hadn’t even called and announced herself…
Luckily that wasn’t going to be a problem since she ran into Andrew on the hallway outside his office.
“Hannah!” He exclaimed in surprise. “What are you doing here, is everything okay?”
“Yes, yes.” She assured him stepping closer. “I was hoping we could talk.” Andrew nodded.
“Just give me a few minutes, I’ve got to… I have some things to take care of. Just wait a bit, please.” Hannah nodded stepping into his office. She looked around thinking: This could have been me… If only she had made some different choices, if only she was a little more selfish…
It wasn’t long before Andrew returned. Taking a seat next to her he asked. “What’s up?” He smiled at her but she couldn’t help but notice at the dark bags under his eyes, or strangely how out of all of them he looked most like their mother… Not wanting to beat around the bush much Hannah said simply.
“I want a job.” He looked surprised.
“A job? Don’t you have a job?” Hannah laughed bitterly.
“I moderate a book club few nights a week… It’s not like I’m irreplaceable…” She looked straight at her brothers face noticing the change in his expression as he worked out just why she was here. He was always so very smart, her brother.
“Look Hannah… I’m not really sure…”
“I know, I know, I don’t have any experience, I’m old… I’m your sister… You have a reputation. I know everything. All I’m asking is a chance… It doesn’t have to be anything big, just… Related to medicine.” She finished trying to smile. Andrew didn’t respond in the same manner.He turned to his computer and started clicking something without a word while Hannah twiddled her thumbs nervously. Minutes, that seemed like hours, passed before he spoke.
“The infectious disease research department is a tad troublesome at the moment… Two of my best doctors left… I was planning to move Geoffrey Langraab there but he would need a lab assistant.” He smiled and Hannah got up throwing herself in his arms.
“Thank you Andrew. Thank you so much.” She whispered in his ear.
And even if it was just temporary while the department gets fully staffed, and even if it was in the basement, for the first time ever Hannah had her own office!